where is This World Heading??..

while my sister talks about wedding plans and seating positions, where the groom will stand and the brides maids walk, i am sitting here oblivious to it all„ smelling my newly bought books :)
Frankie Magazines sit on my table ready to be read, thought about, reworded, and re blogged. it tells of love, happiness, inspiration to be a better person it doesn’t have favorite sex positions. no Naked sex in ball pits. Just good old Truth..

Most of this world isnt like that anymore. the dirtier the better. the sadder this world gets so do the people, children as young as nine are looking at porn, having breakdowns and losing their loves..
how do these once innocent children that had such big imaginations get into the most horrible positions??
where were the parents, their loved ones? No one was there to help them stop it from turning it into a full blown addiction.. why are Girls as young as six having boyfriends and touching their bits??
most Girls i talk to tell me its because they were promised forever, so its perfectly normal to do these things.. only three weeks later to find out they broke up and now moved on to somebody better.. it seems as if we have someone say “Hi” and “forever” in a sentence and all of a sudden we drop all our self control and dignity for them… not even thinking about the consequences,..
where are we heading in this crazy mixed up life?? will we ever stop and bring back imagination??
only we can make this world a better life..


JuLie

xox

decisions...

so many paths to choose in life, do i stay there or go somewhere else? i don't want to go on but i don't want to leave such a beautiful happy place, flourishing with life, an earthly paradise, keeping out the cold dead world. theres so many people, so many listeners, i feel so wanted, so loved and so happy. how do i leave a place that makes me feel so peaceful?

i need to go for it ll turn poison. i must find another paradise i cant give in to reason. if not no one will ever understand me, the more i spend there, the more I'm consumed, so much different speech and sayings that this outside world just doesn't comprehend... i cant be alone in this cold life, when I'm not near you..
Its getting worse as the time goes on, i may have grown, but outside Ive shrunk, and ill keep shrinking, i don't want to go but i need people to hear me.
I'm so scared of my proposed commitment, so many doubts so many denials. so many things that i just cant handle. what if i make the wrong decision?? but what if i stay and regret it??

i just don't want to be the bad child no one understands
anymore..

Love

I guess its all the same fairytale story : girl find guy, girl falls head over heals for guy, girl and guy get together, girl and guy get married and live happily ever after.
sadly, this isn’t true in this world and as i see all around me everyone is unhappy, broken up, annoyed and just plain wondering if this was the right decision..
personally i believe when you’re in love with someone the feeling is so strong, its that strong that you feel it coursing through youre bones, you know its right and no one else makes you have this wonderful feeling.. you treat each other with the utmost respect, never bitter or angry all the time towards the other person, able to talk about your problems and fix them together, set goals together and just love each other even after 5 years..
so many people wonder if they made the right decision, and i believe if you have any doubts or questions, wondering if this is right, then it isn’t, why would you think these things if you know their the one??
i don’t understand why people go with each other if they know its not right, if there jiminy Cricket is chirping in the back of your mind, you should follow it. its chirping for a reason. don’t ever believe that you’ll find no one else, because there is more then one million people on the face of this earth. no matter what anyone tells you..
believe in yourself, and know that your gut feeling is always right. dont let anyone make you feel bad so you will stay with them..
Good luck
xox

sundays

How wonderful is it too be able to spend all day relaxing while sipping tea and basking in the sun :)

Only sundays can give you that calm feeling all over, knowing that you can do anything and not have to worry about commitments etc etc..

The only sad thing is knowing that in a few short hours sunday will finish and life will begin again until you are finally briefly welcomed with this short freedom that next weekend will bring..

Xox

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Vulnerability

The things that we are most scared of are the reason we keep living. So much vulnerability in such small minds, no one can escape it as everyone feels it, most won’t admit it, and some admit it too much. Its there always there, in the back of the mind, pestering telling you all these sugar coated lies,, they never rest, never stopping, always there, always talking. But who are we too choose to ignore it?? Will we not listen or listen too much? All these worries scare us consuming you whole… Will you ignore it? Cap it, bottle tightly til you can’t feel it swirling around anymore.
Bravery is vulnerability kept hidden, who can be a hero if one is scared of everything this world has to offer? Too many woes, too many theories, all swirling around with a negative feeling.
Without this the world would have no drive, no need to look up to anything no need for strive, no need for goals or personal development, the world wouldn’t be real if we didn’t have vulnerability. Vulnerability makes us strong and brave and helps us move on. It helps us do better in this great big world…
Will you choose to ignore it? Or listen to it?

Traveling...

The planning, leading up, packing, circling the date on your calender, setting your alarm for a time only business people or miners would wake up at.. the day comes quickly, and before you know it your off on this uncertain journey that can make or break your life. Your trip will show you things you've been too blinded to see, while realizing what you took for granted in your normal everyday life. Some people count down the days before their trip is over because its just not what they wanted. but then others wish it would never end, like they could run away from everything in their lives back home. Sadly, either way that day comes usually filled with sadness and hurrying. they checkout, count heads and hit the road toward commitment, waving goodbye freedom...

but we suck it up, take a deep breath, and board the plane. descend and soon enough land. this is when the stress comes into play, we leave the Tarmac, walking in lines like at the grocery store,,, usually greeted with strangers and loneliness, theres no warm arms waiting for us from friends or family. we start the pressure and worry looking at the signs, while racing toward the round about luggage pickup area and impatiently waiting til we see the label to identify its your luggage from the other boring same colored suitcases like yours coming down the line. without even realizing it were running , dodging people and knocking them out of the way to get the bags before there carried off, leaving you waiting for them to come back around...

this is when we usually stop smiling and put our serious faces on. we run to the car or other means of getting home,.

Soon enough you reach your neighbourhood and somehow you realize so many things look different, you appear to see the bigger picture and everything looks new and slightly creepy almost like a movie. you reach Home, and realize even that too looks different , un lived in and more run down then you thought. you take time to see the shape and the state of it, the grass, plants , trees and even sometimes the gate.. we look at everything we usually forget to any other usual day..

the holiday you just had soon becomes a distant memory almost like a dream. But that soon becomes okay when you get inside and feel that presence you've been dying to feel all the time you werent here.. you become aware of how much you missed since you came back..

Even though homesickness greets you very quickly into your Trips, you still cant wait til you get to go on another one, usually counting down the days or months til its upon you again.. often wishing the days would go faster cause you've become stuck in the same routine day after day, the one you promised yourself you wouldn't get into again.. but you knew that was a lie anyways...

Yep, Holidays can be Great. they leave you refreshed, showing you everything you should be grateful for, and also shows you things that ll stay with you for all your days.

That is truly lovely

xox

Word Vomit

its become stronger now,

what started off as a whisper in the farr side of my brain has become a loud cry.

ive started to mouth the words and silently spill it out, as if im technically not lying cause no one hopefully can hear me say it.

sadly, i know this is a lie and what im doing isnt right.

but i cant help it, I long to be able to just scream it out to EVeryone! Just SHOUT and not care whos listening, i dream of it, always thinking about it.. But now i actually Spoke it.. theres always a moment where its needed,, where it can cover a million different areas.. Its such a powerful thing! its such a Thrill its just what i need to get my point across.. i want to do it more as if its my new shiny toy. the more i think about it the more appealing it is...

its now spilling out of my mouth on so many occasions as if its neverending Word Vomit.. i dont know how much longer i can stay without this for.. i dont know how to not let it take over like a Flame to paper its spreading more and more with each minute..

but i must come up with a way..

before these meaningless words take over and win...

xox